1. Science teachers aren’t supposed to know how to play the piano.

2. If a kid says, “…Or else!” and you ask, “Or else WHAT?”, you deserve the answer that you get! (For the record, it was, “I’ll lock you up and throw away the key!” But he was joking. I think.)

3. When public officials are caught misbehaving, hope and pray it’s for something easier to explain to young kids than prostitution. Thanks, Governor.

4. Never put the camera away. Never, ever, ever put the camera away.

5. If you consistently use the same verbal expressions, be prepared to be mimicked. Now every time I click on the wrong weblink or drop something, my entire class gleefully shouts, “Just kidding!”

6. Don’t go off on a five-minute tangent with your class unless you’re prepared for it to take 45 minutes.

7. The quickest way to spread news around school is to whisper it in one kid’s ear where other kids can see you. The slowest way is to announce it to everyone in the group at once.